Gaming Ettiquette

I admit the pinnacle  of my video game skills peaked at Pac Man (Google it youngsters). I have been informed however that video games have evolved to rival major motion pictures including a rating system. Gamers can also play with other gamers online around the world. With this global village to available to test your skill level, there are bound to be some toes stepped on and so again rules must be implemented to keep the playing field civil, no matter how much your game mate in Sri Lanka is annoying you  by rubbing their latest victory in your face.



1. Play Fair
Don't cheat, if you want to win, sharpen your skill level until you do.


2. Be A Good Sport
Win or lose be a gracious victor or opponent.


3.  Save the Caps for the dentist
  It's the text equivalent of yelling at everyone, keep it lower case.

4. You Were a Noob (newbie) Too
Learning  a new game and getting familiar  with all the details can be unsettling no matter what your skill level. Joe Cocker said he can get by with a little help from his friends, lend a hand and help the new player get up to speed instead of giving them the scarlet letter of "noob" and giving them the brush off. After all isn't a game more fun when all the players present a challenge? Makes for good game playing if you ask me.


 5. There is no "I" in Team
Yes it is an over used cliche' but still holds true. If you are playing as part of a team, keep it that way, every persons participation is important.

6. Don't Be a Quitter
Unless the enviroment is toxic, don't run at the first sign of defeat, keep playing and if you find that you keep losing the battle, enlist the help of a fellow gamer to address your vulnerabilities. Sometimes we are completely unaware of our blind spots.

7. Insults

No matter how well you conduct yourself, there is always someone who likes to hit below the belt. When someone insults you, the best thing to do  is to ignore them. If the insults continue, most chat and voice systems have 'ignore' functions that enable you to block them. Returning the insults  only escalates the situation and has the potential to poison your connection with other gamers in your cyber circle. If you ignore them and they continue the abuse, others will quickly recognize where the source of trouble is.
 
8. Enjoy the Game

It is simple as that, enjoy yourself. That is what  you are there for, to have a good time. Don't let your fun be drained away by becoming obsessed with the game.


With these suggestions in mind, I wish you happy gaming!

Profiles In Manners and Public Displays of Social Graces

Scotty Maloney (Center)

I usually profile icons in history, but this story is too precious to pass up. Jesse Cooper, Drew Gibbs and Zeke Grissom were all nominated for Homecoming King at their high school in Tennessee. They decided that no matter who won, they would bestow the honor to their fellow classmate Scotty Maloney, who has Williams Syndrome, a neurological disorder that affects learning and speech.



"I've been blessed with so many things," Cooper told ABC News' Nashville affiliate WKRN-TV. "I just wanted Scotty to experience something great in his high school days."

"He's always happy, so he deserves some recognition for who he is," Gibbs said.

Scotty (Center) with Jesse Cooper, Drew Gibbs and Zeke Grissom and another classmate.

When Scotty's name was announced at the ceremony, he received a standing ovation as the medal was placed around his neck. This story was a beautiful example of how to treat others. These young men saw this as an opportunity to give to  publicly honor a fellow classmate  and treat him like "one of the guys" .

Scotty's teacher Liz Hestle Gassaway felt this selfless act by these three young men set a wonderful  example that others would be wise to follow. "We want people to have more empathy towards people, not be scared of people with disabilities," she said. "We want them to embrace them, more like the boys did."

Scotty proudly shows off his medal as Homecoming King

Actions like these make me proud to know that not everyone in this generation has succumbed to the abyss of reality television and the sometimes mindless social media. Kudos to these outstanding young men!

The Notation Knife: Gratitude with your food

Gratitude is one social grace that never goes out of style and everyone has a tradition of how they express gratitude for the pleasure of dining. Those of the traditional christian faith give thanks before their meal, those in the Jewish community give thanks before and after, and others have their own expression of gratitude for the pleasures they enjoy. In my research of unique dining utensils, I came across the "Notation Knife"; a beautifully crafted  knife was created around the16th century. It is believed that this utensil was used to both carve and present the food, probably meat, to nobility.  The knife, whose origin has not been confirmed (though some suspect it was made in Italy) is made of steel with a handle made of brass, ivory and silver.


The knife was beautifully inscribed with notations expressing gratitude for the enjoyment of a good meal. The inscription on one side of the blade reads "The blessing of the table. May the three-in-one bless that which we are about to eat."  This would be sung before the meal was taken. On the other side the inscription gives thanks after the meal, "The saying of grace. We give thanks to you God for your generosity."

Being an avid music lover I was curious to know what these songs of gratitude would sound like in that time. Luckily Flora Denis, an Art Historian for the University of Sussex did the research to bring these beautiful melodies back to life. (See the last 2 minutes of the clip). It is a delightful melody with beautiful harmonies. I would have found it quite enjoyable to listen to  if I had lived in that time at the beginning and end of my meal.

 This lovely knife is very rare and highly valuable so should you come across one at your local thrift store quietly pay your couple of dollars for it and sing your way to your nearest "Antiques Roadshow" for a huge recompense.

I'm back!!

SO SORRY FOR THE LONG SPACE BETWEEN BLOGS, MY COMPUTER CRASHED AND BURNED. I AM BACK (WITH A NEW LAPTOP AND PLENTY TO SAY!) AND WILL HAVE A NEW POST FOR YOU SOON. 

SMOOCHES!

Back To School Etiquette

I need a nap right now!

With the children going back to school, I share this poem chuck full of manners reminders for children of every age.

 

 

All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten

by Robert Fulghum

Most of what I really need
To know about how to live
And what to do and how to be
I learned in kindergarten.
Wisdom was not at the top
Of the graduate school mountain,
But there in the sandpile at Sunday school.

These are the things I learned:

Share everything.
Play fair.
Don't hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don't take things that aren't yours.
Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life -
Learn some and think some
And draw and paint and sing and dance
And play and work everyday some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out into the world,
Watch out for traffic,
Hold hands and stick together.
Be aware of wonder.

12 Tips for a more polished appearance at social gatherings

I have learned by experience that because people are always watching you and making internal judgments, it is wise to be aware of your outward presentation. The little things can send a big message.


1.   Yawning-  If you are tired or in the company of boring or dull conversation try to stifle the yawn, always cover your mouth and apologize graciously for the yawn.


2.  Be aware of other people's personal space- some people prefer a little distance when engaging in conversation


3.   Staring and pointing- It is never in good taste to stare at people or to point at them. A quick  glance in their direction is fine. Pointing can make a person feel self-conscious.


4.   Gum Chewing- Mints to freshen up your breath is a better alternative.


5.   Nail biting, cracking knuckles, foot taping- these are nervous behaviors, just relax and enjoy the atmosphere.


6.    Angry outbursts- Avoid them. If the situation is too intense to address in a calm tone, take a deep breath or two and politley excuse yourself from the room until you can regain your composure.


7.   Public grooming- freshening your make up, fixing your hair, etc. in public is not appropriate. Make those adjustments in the restroom. A quick glance at yourself in your compact is fine.


8.   Loud talking- Unless you are hard of hearing, speak softly with those around you.


9.   Putting on airs-Being pretentious or snobby is unacceptable.


10.   A negative attitude or Complaining- Like a wet blanket, this behavior is very annoying and unwelcome so don’t go there. If you find yourself on the receiving end of this type of conversation try to graciously steer the conversation in a positive direction or politely excuse yourself.


11. Be complimentary of the food and beverages-  Let the Host/Hostess know you are enjoying the refreshments.


12.  Send a thank you note- Alot of time and money went into the event so let those who invited you know you appreciate being invited.




The hosts of parties and gatherings always remember polished gracious behavior and find great pleasure in inviting those guests to future events.

Bartender Etiquette

 Tom Bullock (1872 - 1964)

Tom Bullock was the first African-American to write a cocktail book, called "The Ideal Bartender" in 1917.  Bullock was the only African-American to write a cocktail book to this day according to D.J. Frienz, co-author of the reprinted version of Bullocks original work.

 Bullock was born in Louisville, Kentucky shortly after the Civil War . Bullock worked at country clubs from a very young age. Later he became to be a well-recognized bartender of the time at St. Louis Country Club, where he served drinks and cocktails for government officials and other elite members.

George Herbert Walker, grandfather of George W. Bush was one of the big fans of Bullock's cocktails, wrote the introduction to Bullock's book. He spoke of of Bullocks expertise by stating, " I have known the author for many years, and it is a privilege to be permitted to testify to his qualifications. ... In all that time I doubt that he has erred in event one of his concoctions."

Bartender Etiquette

 

1. Keep the Bar Clean
People come have cocktails, relax, and enjoy some down time. This hard to do when dirty glassware  dishes, and/or sticky bartops and tables are present. The cleanliness and organization of your bar is a DIRECT reflection of your skills and experience, so keep your area clean and presentable.

2.  Your Customers should be treated Fairly and Equally
If you’re one of those bartenders who ignores the guy waiting for 10 minutes to help a pretty girl that  just walked up to the bar, then you are being inconsiderate. The “first come first serve” approach is the best approach

3. Mind Your Own  Business
It’s easy for bartenders to overhear private conversations. Keep in mind that most customers  don’t realize that you can hear them. Keep your comments and facial expressions to yourself to avoid uncomfortable situations.

4. You Control the drink limit, Not the patron
All experienced bartenders know you have to monitor the clarity or drunkenness of an individual and make a decision whether or not you can continue to serve them drinks.
It is not fun to limit someone having a good time, but it’s part of the job. By acting responsibly, you reduce the liability of yourself and your establishment.

5.  Good Hygiene is Essential
Wash your hands regularly, shave, wear a clean and ironed uniform every day, keep your nails clean, breath mints on hand, and do not run your fingers through your hair or rub your face. If you’re ill, stay home!

Your hands and fingers should never be near the areas of the glassware that touches your customers mouth. If you have to retrieve an ice cube or a lime wedge from a cocktail, use a clean bar spoon, not your fingers.

6. Take Pride in Your Work
Take the time to learn the correct recipes for the most popular cocktails. You are always a student of mixology, staying current on new cocktails.

7. Tip Protocol
All service staff should only count tips after a shift and not in the presence of the customers.  Always take care in making sure your customer never feels pressured to leave you a tip. If you give good service and make a customer feel special, you’ll get a tip.