Pageant Etiquette

PAGEANT ETIQUETTE

1. When you are in the audience, do not speak badly about any of the contestants. You never know if the contestant's family is sitting right behind you. Don’t speak negatively about the pageant, the pageant director and the judges might be within earshot.


2. Arrive on time, whether you’re a contestant or a guest.


3. Be respectful to each contestant by being quiet during her onstage walk or performance.

4. Clap for EVERY contestant!


5. If you’re in the audience and need to get up from your seat, please refrain from doing it  during a child’s walk onstage. Wait until the contestant has left the stage.

For Pageant Moms:


1. If you’re going to be onstage with your baby or small child, dress appropriately, and help your child to shine!


2. Even if you’re backstage or somewhere else in private, do not criticize other contestants in front of your child. It sends a negative message to impressionable children and influences your child to emulate the same behavior.


3. If you want to give cues or stand up to get a child’s attention when she’s onstage to help her, do it from the side as not to distract the audience.


4. Congratulate the winners. This is a great way to teach to your child the importance of good sportsmanship.

5. If your child is one of the pageant winners, don’t allow her  flaunt her victory front of the other contestants, but instruct her to be gracious to the other girls who competed with her. 

For Crying Out Loud

Evil communications corrupt good manners.

-Hebrew Proverb

Social Graces and the 4th amendment, the world is NOT your confessional!!!!

"I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought... but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds. "Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Raise the roof." Who gives a...." Mr. Griffith from the movie  "Easy A"

 
It is astounding to me how people complain constantly about Facebook and other social media  violating their privacy by making their private information vulnerable to  people who are not their "friends", yet they by their own volition constantly feel the need to  keep people updated with frivolous information. I mean really, do I need to know you had a great slice of pizza at the local pizza parlor? I see the commercials on television and if I am hungry, I will go get a slice myself.  While I am at it, no I do not need to know what you and your partner "did" last night, see inappropriate photos of you posted on your page or any other information that should be kept private. People were in an uproar a few weeks ago about potential employers asking for their Facebook passwords when they were interviewing for a job so they could look at their pages. While I know that is going too far, at the end of the day if we are posting our deepest darkest secrets for the world to see, now is not the time to start complaining about being "violated", we opened that door with our free flowing speech to violate ourselves. 


Just because we have an opinion, does not mean it needs to be publicly voiced and it certainly does not mean that we have the right to say it with cruelty and unkindness. When I read certain articles,  I am disgusted at the vile, cruel, unkind, racist and foolish things people are constantly saying in the comments section  because of the anonymity of the Internet. Wisdom dictates that some things we just need to keep to ourselves. However, the tide is turning and free speech is not as "free" as people have been led to believe. People who smear businesses are being tracked down by their computers code number and being sued. I recently attended a seminar where the head of the organization sued and won his case against two people (who he discovered later were two of  his competitors) who were falsely slandering his business. People who slam their bosses on their social media pages are finding themselves in hot water and sometimes fired. After seeing the movie The Hunger Games, a slew of teens and young adults that  tweeted racist remarks about one of the lead characters are getting into alot of trouble. The  huge backlash moved the guilty parties to quickly shut down their twitter accounts.


When the "founding fathers" spoke of 4th amendment rights, I do not believe it was meant to be used to speak whatever is on our minds at the moment. The provision was made so that people could stand for what was right without fear of being jailed or killed, not so nateisgreat28 or discoqueen227 can leave a scathing remark or comment and not be found out. If we really value our privacy like we say we do, then it is time we reinstate our self respect, stop using the world as our confessional and take measures to keep our private lives private and not ask our social media "friends" to raise the roof every time we do something trivial.  If we want the social media sites and the web to stop violating our privacy, then we have to stop giving them reasons to. Would it not be better to utilize our 4th amendment rights on the global stage for more noble causes that elevate and empower people? With that in mind go freely enjoy your coke zero and that slice of pizza tweet free! 

Gambling Etiquette

You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, and know when to run.

 -Kenny Rogers (The Gambler).

•  Understand the rules before you sit down.
  
  
• Only buy or cash in chips between hands.
  
  
• When you buy in, the dealer may ask what denomination of chips you prefer. You should know that red chips are $5, greens are $25, and blacks are $100. Some high limit tables have additional colors.
  
  
• When you cash out, the dealer's preference is for you to trade in smaller denominations of chips for large ones.
  
  
• If the cards are dealt face up, never touch your cards.
  
  
• If the cards are dealt face down then only touch your cards with one hand.
  
  
• Never touch your bet once the first card has been dealt. Wait until the hand is over.
  
  
• Do not drink excessively, it is wise to be sober when money is at stake!
  
  
• Do not ask the dealer for advice. Remember they work for the "House" not you!
  
  
• Do not solicit pity if you have a bad hand, everyone has experienced this at one time or another. (Practice your "poker face" ahead of time as  you don't want to give yourself away every time being the obvious sourpuss!)
  
  
• The tipping rule is more up to your judgement than the other rules of etiquette. A good tip should be 2/3 based on how friendly and helpful the dealer is and 1/3 on how much your wins/losses are. Even if you lose, still tip if the dealer has been trying to make the experience enjoyable. 
  
  
• Some games, especially blackjack, involve hand signals to signify how you want to play your cards. You must use hand signals, verbal instructions are not enough. Please know them before you sit down. The hand signals in blackjack when the cards are dealt face up:
  • Hit: Tap the table.
  • Stand: Wave your hand, palm open, parallel to the table.
  • Double/Split: Place your matching bet next to, never on top of, your original bet. If you have two fours or two fives, you should hold up one finger if you are doubling, and two fingers if you are splitting.
  
  
  The hand signals in blackjack when the cards are dealt face down:
  • Hit: Lightly scrape the corner of the cards against the felt.
  • Stand: Slide your cards under your bet. Do not lift your chips in the process.
  • Double/Split: Place your cards face up on the table, just above your bet. Then place your matching bet next to, never on top of, your original bet. If you have two fours or two fives, you should hold up one finger if you are doubling, and two fingers if you are splitting.
  
  
  If you lose then lay down your cards face up by your bet. Do not throw them in disgust,  it is very rude and distracting. If you can’t handle losing, then it would be wise to find another activity that is more enjoyable and does not involve losing money!

For Crying Out Loud

Good manners will open doors that the best education cannot.

 

Clarence Thomas

Geisha Etiquette for Tourists

The Blog "Japan Visitor" has provided some guidelines to follow when you encounter Geisha's in Japan:

Geisha Etiquette for Tourists

Camera-wielding tourists from around the world have become more and more aggressive in stalking Kyoto's geisha.

As at the Tsukiji fish market - which just recently let tours back in after banning them because of the many problems caused by the visitors - Kyoto's Gion and Pontocho areas have in recent years been swamped with ever more tourists. Unfortunately, many of these tourists seem to lose any sense of restraint in the presence of frozen tuna or geisha.

Like the fish mongers and auctioneers in Tokyo, Kyoto's geisha (and their clients) are none too happy. Unlike Tsukiji, however, banning tourists from these areas is not an option.

To combat the pushy foreigners, and protect the women, patrols have been created to escort the geisha from tea house to tea house.

A bit of common sense and restraint, though, could solve the problem.

When visiting Kyoto, try to keep in mind the following:

1. Gion, Pontocho, etc. are not theme parks. The women are not dressed up for you.
2. The geisha are working. They will not pose for photos. They are going to an appointment. They are on a schedule. Stay out of their way.
3. Never touch the geisha. It takes hours - literally - to get dressed and prepare for an evening.
4. Never follow them.
5. Do not go into a tea house or private residence.
6. Respect their space. Do not thrust your camera inches from a geisha's face or body.
7. Take your picture and move on.

You are not on a safari in search of a cheetah. Stroll, enjoy the vibe of the neighborhood, take a few pictures from a respectful distance, then go out for dinner and a beer.

That should clear things up!

Profiles In Manners and Public Displays of Social Graces

John Jacob Astor IV

In remembrance of the 100 year anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic, I chose to recognize John Jacob Astor IV. He was said to be the wealthiest man on the Titanic, but it also seems he had a generous heart as well. Not only did he give up his place on  the lifeboat next to his wife to make room for someone else, he took drastic measures to save the life of a fourteen year old boy who was not allowed to board a life boat. The now defunct Warsaw Times newspaper dated April 20, 1912 gives this account:

"Captain Chase F. Crain, U.S.A., one of Carpathia’s passengers, said that one of  the survivors, a boy fourteen years of age, told him that he owed his life to Colonel Astor. The boy’s story, as repeated by Captain Crain, was that when he tried to get into a lifeboat the sailors pushed him back with: “You’re not a girl.”

Colonel Astor, the boy said, happened to be near, saw this and picking up from the deck a girls hat, jammed it on the boys head and watching his chance pushed him into the boat with the women."

Heroic acts that save someones life  in my humble opinion are of far more importance than any social protocols that are violated in the process.

To read the entire article click here.